I am bringing this recipe back, first shared in 2017. After pressing reset on Exhaling Life in November 2021 with Lemon Honey & Soy Sauce Chicken, I removed or archived earlier recipes, essays, and versions of myself. They were placed out of circulation so I could focus, quiet the noise, and attempt to write from a place that felt more honest.
It has been over a year since I began the work of healing. Not surviving. Healing. Learning to be comfortable in my own skin. My final essay of 2022, I Hate That Word… Survivor, lifted a shame that had kept me fractured for decades. I expected anxiety after clicking “publish.” Instead, I felt still.
Garam & Tandoori Rack of Goat comes from a period when I was managing depression, PTSD, and anxiety. I felt somewhat safe, yet still chased. Perhaps I had simply grown accustomed to being chased.
It has been over a year since I began the work of healing. Not surviving. Healing. Learning to be comfortable in my own skin. My final essay of 2022, I Hate That Word… Survivor, lifted a shame that had kept me fractured for decades. I expected anxiety after clicking “publish.” Instead, I felt still.
Garam & Tandoori Rack of Goat comes from a period when I was managing depression, PTSD, and anxiety. I felt somewhat safe, yet still chased. Perhaps I had simply grown accustomed to being chased.
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| Served with saffron rice and cucumber salad |
Cooking, for me, has never been only about food. It is navigation. It is agency. It is the ability to move on my own terms without interference. The interference, in my life, has been harm inflicted by others.
I remember being uneasy the first time I worked with goat. Its fragrance felt unfamiliar, almost confrontational. I was afraid of it.
Instead of avoiding it, I worked with it. I tempered its pungency with carrot tops and masalas. Carrot tops carry a bright, green sharpness, not unlike parsley, that cuts through and steadies the meat. In the process of testing and adjusting, the rack of goat became something balanced and deeply satisfying.
Cooking has helped me manage anxiety because it requires attention without panic. It asks for presence. I am learning that life can resemble that process. When I move toward what feels dark instead of away from it, something shifts. What once felt overwhelming becomes manageable. Sometimes even good.
I remember being uneasy the first time I worked with goat. Its fragrance felt unfamiliar, almost confrontational. I was afraid of it.
Instead of avoiding it, I worked with it. I tempered its pungency with carrot tops and masalas. Carrot tops carry a bright, green sharpness, not unlike parsley, that cuts through and steadies the meat. In the process of testing and adjusting, the rack of goat became something balanced and deeply satisfying.
Cooking has helped me manage anxiety because it requires attention without panic. It asks for presence. I am learning that life can resemble that process. When I move toward what feels dark instead of away from it, something shifts. What once felt overwhelming becomes manageable. Sometimes even good.
INGREDIENTS
[serves two as a main]
one pound and three ounces rack of goat, cut into two pieces
one teaspoon garam masala
two tablespoons ginger, diced
three garlic cloves, roughly chopped
two teaspoons olive oil
one teaspoon tandoori masala
one bunch carrot tops, chopped
salt and freshly cracked pepper to season
Pat the racks dry thoroughly with paper towels.
In a bowl, rub the racks with olive oil, garam masala, tandoori masala, ginger, garlic, salt, and freshly cracked pepper. Generously place carrot tops around the racks. Cover and refrigerate for at least six hours.
Remove the racks from the refrigerator thirty minutes before cooking.
Preheat the oven to 375°F.
Sear the racks on all sides in an oven-safe skillet with the carrot tops until lightly browned. Remove the carrot tops before transferring the skillet to the oven.
Roast for 30 to 45 minutes, beginning to check the internal temperature at 30 minutes. Cook until the center reaches 145°F for medium. Let rest for five minutes before serving.
In a bowl, rub the racks with olive oil, garam masala, tandoori masala, ginger, garlic, salt, and freshly cracked pepper. Generously place carrot tops around the racks. Cover and refrigerate for at least six hours.
Remove the racks from the refrigerator thirty minutes before cooking.
Preheat the oven to 375°F.
Sear the racks on all sides in an oven-safe skillet with the carrot tops until lightly browned. Remove the carrot tops before transferring the skillet to the oven.
Roast for 30 to 45 minutes, beginning to check the internal temperature at 30 minutes. Cook until the center reaches 145°F for medium. Let rest for five minutes before serving.
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